How I let of go of my past

“Hey guys!
I remember back when I was first dumped, one of the main things that discouraged me was the very low ratio of success stories versus tales of heartbreak, misery and loneliness. The thing is, once someone heals from the traumatic experience of being heartbroken, they usually tend to carry on with their lives and do not go back to support those who are new to the experience. Of course, some people are an exception to this rule, but that’s how it usually works in my experience.


So, I promised myself some months ago that I would come back when I feel better to encourage those who are just starting their bittersweet experience of healing.
Very quickly about myself – I was with a girl for 3 years, planned to marry her, but was forced to leave the country temporarily for work. Long story short, after less than 3 months of me being away (I would fly to see her every month) she told me she wasn’t in love with me any more, broke up with me and told me there was someone else.
A month after breaking up with me she was already with the new guy, with me having to purchase a magnifying glass to look for the pieces of my shattered heart. Now, I’m an athletic / macho type of guy and have always been considered as very self-controlled and tough, but this break up really got to me.
I was a wreck.
I lost my job because of it, couldn’t concentrate for weeks and cried in the proud loneliness of my sad apartment.
The break up was over 4 months ago. I maintained contact and it was WRONG. VERY WRONG.
All I could do is facebook-stalk her, her friends, etc, waiting for the moment she posts photos of her with her new boyfriend. And soon enough she did! Oh the joy of looking at the person you wanted to be with for the rest of your life (the person who swore her undying love for you) kissing with someone she left you for, with so much joy in their eyes… How wonderfully cruel life can be!
So I cut off contact.
This is the best advice I can give to ANYONE in that situation – do it!
I kept contact thinking she might come to her senses and want to get back with me (although I had promised myself I would never take her back – the paradox of human nature, right?). But it just ended up hurting me more.
Once I deleted her everything became so much MORE EASY to handle . It really does give you back the control and it is a wonderful feeling. Go for it – cut contact.
The thing is, unless your ex partner is a complete tool, you can always re-establish contact with them years later if you so wish. And if they won’t accept you back as a friend, then you are really so much better off without a small person like that.
So yeah, now I am single and yes, I do still think of her sometimes, etc., but it doesn’t hurt me anymore. Before, every single memory of her would cause me an unbearable amount of pain. Not any more.
So PLEASE, cut contact, The pain will go away – for some more slowly than for others, but it will fade into the past.
Make positive efforts to let go of the past, forgive everyone and try to develop a positive outlook at life. If you can’t do it right away, fake it until you make it!